Life of Mom

The thing about being a full time mom is that it is just that. Full time. You never get a break. You never get a day off. You never get a vacation. You may go on vacation, but (and especially if you’re with your family), you are still on duty the entire time. You are still rounding up meals and taking care of imagined and real hurts to the child. You are still disciplining and entertaining.

When children get sick, they get to stay home from school, lay on the couch, and watch movies all day while Mom brings them food and drink, rubs their back and holds their hair during vomiting sessions, drives to doctors and pharmacies, and is at the child’s beck and call for the entire day.

When Dad gets sick, he gets to stay home from work and take long naps and Mom still brings him food and drink and runs errands (which may include doctor’s offices and pharmacies) and tries to keep the kids extra entertained and quiet so Dad can rest up and get better quickly. Mom still has her normal duties of the day, which she does while taking care of sick Dad. Heaven help her if kids and Dad are sick at the same time.

When Mom gets sick, people still have to go to school and lunches still have to be made. Snack still have to be given, and preschoolers still have to be reminded to sit on the potty at regular intervals. Homework still has to be completed, books still have to be read, kids still have to wear clothes. All of this is done by Mom. No one spends the day bringing her fluids or rubbing her back. No one is there to keep the kids quiet or take them to the park so Mom can get a nap.

When Dads go to work, they interact with other adults and get to do something that feels like accomplishment. They bring home a regular paycheck that validates their worth in the workplace.

When Moms stay home, they can go days without talking to another adult, they have to ask for money from their husband, and Mother’s Day is just about the one day of the year where anyone makes a big deal and validates the hard works she has done all year. There are no paychecks, no bonuses, no quarterly evaluations to check up on her.

I’m not complaining at all about the seemingly unfairness of it all. There are rewards beyond measure about staying home with my kids. I’m grateful for it. Life is tough, but having me at home with he kids is one of the only truly good decisions we’ve made.

I’m just sick and would like a true vacation. Is that too much to ask? If you’re a mom, yeah. It really kind of is.

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10 responses to “Life of Mom

  1. Yep. You’re so right.
    Some mothers, however, DO get sick days. They drop the children off at childcare and go home and go back to bed. It gets under my skin when they then complain about never getting a sick day as a mother and I know that dropping off the child is not the same as staying in bed all day . …

    wait, I’m one step away from a rant I don’t want to make in a completely inappropriate forum. Sorry. I won’t hijack your blog.

    I just want to say hi. I know. I wish I could take your kids for a day. I hope you get better soon.

    *hugs*

    • oh my heck, I’ll rant for you. My sister’s kids practically LIVE at the daycare and then she has the nerve to call me and tell me how it’s *so* hard on the weekends when she has to take care of them *all* day. Uhhh….

      Then last week she had to go out of town for 4 days so the kids were left with her husband. He left the kids at the daycare for an entire 2 days, sent them to a neighbor babysitter the 3rd day (cuz one of the kids was sick and he just couldn’t handle that *pout*), and then he had them on the 4th day (but it was sunday so they were in primary for a few hours too!) Then, on Sunday night his fb status says, “My heart goes out to all the single mom’s out there. It is so hard to have the kids all to myself!” I had to literally bite my tongue not to say anything.

      Ok, I’m done. 😛

  2. I love this post Sariah! I feel the same way.

    Maybe when we move I’ll have to drive out to PHX and kidnap you and we’ll have a kid-free weekend doing something crazy…like sleeping.

  3. OH boy…we can have a good long conversation about this together (in a few days…hehe)! Anyhow, on the flip side I feel so sad for my husband who hardly ever gets to see his children…really, he hardly ever gets to spend REAL time with them. 5-8PM weeknights, maybe Saturday (if there isn’t stuff to do outside of the home, and there always is!) and Sunday when he isn’t in meetings and doing other church responsibilities. I wouldn’t trade my time with my boys for the world. (Although eventually I really do need a vacay away or else I go bonkers!)

    In other news…we really need to talk about getting you up here to Alaska…seriously. I’ve done it with a couple of other friends over a weekend and it worked out SUPER. We’ll figure it out. AND you’ll feel more comfortable KNOWING me for real, in real life and that you aren’t walking into some shanty town, blog stalkers home in AK. LOL!

    K.

  4. But when the kids are older you can soooo guilt them into looking after you when you are sick. So save it up, because you will get payback later.

  5. I have been feeling the same way! All three of my boys and my husband were sick last week. (Mike is a SUPER huge baby too.) All they had was a cold so no throwing up but they all wanted Mommy to snuggle them and take care of them (especially Mike ;)) And….like you said, it is hard! Thankfully, I didn’t get sick but I had 3 tests and a funeral on top of everything else. I need a vacation too! I NEED SLEEP!!!

  6. We need to make those plans for June!!! How about a day at the Zoo, a day shopping, a day at a spa, and a day just sitting around the house watching movies?

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