Dearest Offspring,

I know that you love me.  I know that you love to play with me.  I know that you love to hang around my legs as I try to cook our meals.  I know that you love to jump on my stomach as I lay on the couch or lay down on the floor for a quick break.  I know that you love to have me hug you and hold you and kiss you, just not wipe your runny nose.  I know that you love to eat my cereal from my bowl because it obviously tastes better than your own cereal in your own bowl.  I know that you love to explore the drawers and cabinets that down’t have child-locks on them.  I know that you love to play in the water that I’m trying to use in the dishwasher, the clothes washer, the sink of dishes, and my shower.  I know that you love to play with my delicate figurines more than your toys because obviously my delicate figurines are more special.

Now, dearest offspring, I can handle all of this.  Really I can.  But only if you let me take a freakin’ shower so I can wash my hair!!  PLEASE!!

Thank you.  I love all three of you very much.  I’ll be in the bathroom, with the door locked, so don’t set anything on fire, okay?

Love, Your Mommy

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7 responses to “Dearest Offspring,

  1. I’d be willing to share my shower if they weren’t barging in on me when I was using the restroom or standing at the door banging shouting “Daddy, wha’ you doin’?”

  2. Jacob gets mad at me because I stick him in his room when I shower – He has gotten into WAY to much trouble in my short moments away, and lately has fivured out how to remove the outlet covers… Needless to say I have learned to take SUPER fast showers. 🙂

  3. heeheehee.

    I tell you, the secret is to shower at night once the boys are in bed. It is the secret to my …

    wait, I almost tried to say I was successful. Well, it’s how I stay clean.

  4. this is the way you do it…it’s a game…tie them together with a rope and have them try to get out…just kidding I have no idea, Chloe just plays in our room while I shower, so far she hasn’t gotten into to much trouble.

  5. What I do is I get their breakfast on the table, say the prayer with them and then go take a shower. Oh, I also tell Nathan that he needs to clean Ben up after breakfast. Hyrum needs to clear the table and then they need to start their schoolwork. But Sarina just runs around and bangs on the door and after I’m out she watches the crack between the door & the floor and tells me that she can see me.

    But on our not perfect days (which are at least 5 day a week) the children run around the house, get even more cereal -of course overflowing their bowls- and then there are 100 million MORE fingerprints & pencil marks to clean off the walls. The joys of motherhood. 😉

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