So the Drama

I don’t know how this happens.  Do I have a big sign on my forehead, advertising a need to have friends with drama?  I think I have an eye twitch.  Or some kind of a twitch.  It’s actually under my eye.  Twitching away.  Twitch.  Twitch.  Twitch.  It’s rather annoying.

I have become friendly with another girl at church.  Our kids are in the same primary class and kindergarten class.  The family just moved here from Spokane (so we are familiar with the same area of the Pacific Northwest).  Everything is going great.  We don’t have a ton in common, but she’s nice.  It’s nice to have friends.  I’m a social person, normally, but I haven’t made that “connection” with anyone here.  So I take what I can get for friends for the time being.

The other day I called her and she sounded like she had been crying or something.  I asked what’s wrong and she said she just caught her husband cheating.  He was talking to some girl online and it was really explicit.  Well, after a couple hours and some investigation, it turned out the girl in question had been making a bunch of stuff up to get to my friend.  Wierd, but whatever.

A few days later I find out through my friend that another girl we both know (I guess I’d call myself a “friendly acquaintance” to the girl) is having major problems because she found out her husband is molesting their daughters.  Woah.  Lots of time at the police station and lying to the husband so he doesn’t know that they know so he won’t do anything crazy.  Trying to get one of the daughters to say it’s the dad that is for sure doing this so he can be arrested.  Just really heavy, hard, and sad stuff going on there.

This morning my new friend called really early asking if I can come pick up her son and take him to school and take her to the courthouse.  Sure, I say.  No problem.  As I’m driving her to the courthouse she says the reason she has to be there is because her husband was arrested last night.  He hit her.  He admitted to the police that he hit her 5 or 6 times and it was all unprovoked.  As my friend was on her cell phone with someone at the courthouse, trying to get directions, she got a little upset because they kept asking her, “Are you the victim?” and she would answer, “Yes, I’m his wife.”  She didn’t like being called the victim.  I told her the thing is she IS the victim!!  Anyway, she’s supposed to call me later and let me know what’s going on.  I bet anything he gets out of jail, is told to take anger management, and in a few months time we’ll be doing this all over again.  Yup, I’m pretty pessimistic.

The thing my friend is most worried about is her 5 year old son seeing his father being taken away in handcuffs.  Yeah, I’d be worried, too, but maybe it’s good for him to see the consequences of his father’s actions.

My friend said to me today, “I’m so sorry for all this drama I’ve brought into your life.”  I laughed and replied, “Yeah, you know, I have had a lot of drama in this past week!!”

I don’t mind being there for a friend and giving rides and advice (when asked for!!) and such.  It’s just emotionally very draining.  Very, very draining.  I’d like to go back to my regularly scheduled drama, please.  Thank you very much.

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9 responses to “So the Drama

  1. You are such an amazing friend. You have amazing resources of patience and charity — I need to be more unconditional like you. Sending cyber hugs! and a new plant. No drama with facebook plants! 😀

  2. That is totally hard. I am sorry that you have to deal with that. I am also sending a plant 😉

    And I can let you trounce me in scrabulous… oh wait, you are doing that on your own 😉

  3. I agree that everything that happend sucks and that you have to deal with that on top of everything else, but having everybody feel comftorable enough to come to you I’d take as a compliment…not everybody would tell that stuff to just anybody, it shows that they trust you and consider you a very good friend! 🙂

  4. Hmmm, well, I hope things have started running along at a more even keel now. That type of drama would be enough to throw anyone off. She is lucky she has a friend like you. (And by the way, the word “victim” seems very weak and demeaning and I completely understand anyone’s reluctance to identify with it.)

  5. Wow! I don’t envy you one bit! That is so sad! It’s got to be hard to see all these families going through such HUGE trials! It makes my trials seem really insignificant! Good luck iwth it all!

  6. You are being such a good friend to theose people. While having people around you that are going through drama is can be quite draining. The fact that you are holding up on your own while also supporting them is to be praised. I hope things improve.

  7. Yikes – what a week. It is so hard to see families and especially friends, go through trials like this. I agree with ABQ – you are to be praised. 🙂 And, I hope things improve too.

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