I am such a bad mommy. Really and truely. I’ve been having a hard time of late, and I don’t really know why. Everything has been getting to me, and Ches’ long hours at school haven’t helped. I told him the other day that I’m going to need “a night off” where I can do whatever I want all by myself. He’s totally fine with that. I think he wants his normal wife back.
Monday night I was going to take my night off, but by the time Ches got home and I got dinner prepared, I just didn’t want to go out. I still needed some quiet time, so I locked myself into the computer room and played on the computer and ate my dinner and basically ignored the rest of the family for an hour or so.
Ches did great with the boys. He fed them, played with them, then started their baths. I figured I could help out a little with that, and as I was helping Aiden get washed up, Ches had to go make an important phone call for work. I was talking to Aiden about all sorts of stuff, and the subject of where I was at dinner came up. I told him I needed some quiet time. When he asked me why, I replied with The Worst Thing To Say To Your Child.
“If Mommy doesn’t get quiet time every now and then, I’m just going to run away forever.”
Aiden took me completely seriously and started crying. Bawling. I had just ripped his heart out and eaten it for my bedtime snack. I spent the next hour and a half apologizing and saying I didn’t mean it, that I was just kidding, and that I will never, ever run away. I wouldn’t even make it to the end of the block because I love my family so much! Aiden was still very upset at bedtime and hugged me extra tight as a few more tears poured from his eyes.
As he got dressed the next morning, he was acting very depressed, and when I asked him what’s wrong, he said he really, really, really didn’t want me to run away. So I started the apology process all over again. He doesn’t believe me when I tell him I’m not running away. All he believes is one stupid, flip reply. It’s amazing how one sentence can hurt someone so much. I guess I have to keep working on the “I’m not running away. Never, ever. I love you and I’m staying here forever and ever” until he starts to believe me. And I bet I don’t get any more nights off any time soon.
Chocolate Phoenix 
Come on… Run away forever. hell yeah he believes it. but maybe if you left him believeing that then you might get a little friggen help. Hello Ches…wifey needs a ****** break. Important phone call my ***. If that guy gave a **** he’d tell you to get your *** back in the computer room and leave the bath to him.
It ain’t like the man never gave the kid a bath. What the ****? do you really do it better? NO, just differently. Quit setting yourself up to NOT get away. you really will run away.
Ummm, wow. Thanks for your concern, DMM. I really do appreciate it, but I think you’ve gotten the wrong idea. I don’t think you’ve read my blog much, huh? Ches is a wonderful husband and father. I was going to write this entire response of just how wonderful Ches is, but I don’t think I need to. Read more of my blog and you’ll get the idea!
Also, I’ve edited your comment because such strong language is not something I’m comfortable with. I understand your passion, but I prefer a “G” rating for my blog. Thanks for stopping by! 🙂
Um wow, I was going to come in and say how sorry I was that this happened to you Sariah… really I was, but who is the other commenter? That was a bit harsh towards Ches who I am sure is doing his best. Sounds like someone needs their mouth washed out with soap!
WOW DMM. You Certainly live up to your name. Obviously you haven’t read this blog all that much before because you wouldn’t be talking like that if you “knew” them.
Sometimes mammas just need to vent and instead of throwing out profanity maybe a little compassion would get you further.
Oh I forgot to say…
“Awww Look Sariah got her first hate mail.” I’m still waiting for mine. Maybe DMM will come to my blog and …
Sariah things will get better. One time I told Tweedle D after he shared something awsome with me “Get Out.” I forgot he didn’t understand sarcasm or whatever it is when you don’t say what you mean like you know “shut up” anyway his face melted and so did my heart. Your not a bad mommy we all make mistakes, say things we don’t mean. (I’m not even sharing one of my worst its too awful) The best thing you can do now is appoligize and try harder next time.
Sending a Cyber Hug.
Oh Sariah, I feel so badly for both you and Aiden! I’m so sorry!
We do all need breaks, but thanks for warning me to be careful with what I say to explain them!
Sending lots of hugs. And some plants, you need plants. They’ll be on facebook. Your own virtual garden.
Eep to the first comment, she obviously doesn’t know Ches.
Don’t be so hard on yourself! Every mom says something she immediately regrets! This was months ago, but Nathan’s plans changed last minute and he couldn’t come home and Jaedin was being a TURD and I told him that Dad wasn’t coming home because Jaedin was behaving too badly, which totally crushed Jaedin. As soon as it came out of my mouth I knew I shouldn’t have said it–I was just frustrated!! So don’t worry, kids have short memory spans for a reason 🙂
You may not remember this, I don’t even know if you were there, but when I was like 5 or 6 (when we lived in Arkansas) and walking to the park one sunday afternoon with at least Vinnie, Dad, and Lura, I asked where Mom was. The reply (either from Vinnie or Dad, I don’t remember) was: “Mom won’t be around anymore. She died earlier.”
All I remember is being really upset and crying until we got home. And you know, if I don’t talk to mom every couple days, I STILL start having nightmares that she died and no one told me.
This comment probably doesn’t help much. Sorry. But I kinda feel bad for Aiden.
By the way, I don’t think the first comment was “hate mail.” I think part of the fun of a blog is having random people stop by.
Sariah, I’ve told my kids I was going to run away before too. I know the point of where you’re so frustrated and nothing is working and when you get no alone time it’s hard. I’ve said it and hurt my boys feelings too. But they still love me thank heavens. I’m sure Aiden will forgive you and I’m sure he’ll forget you even said it, soon.
Oh poor Aiden… and you, I bet you both feel terrible!! hopefully he’ll understand soon that you didn’t mean it. I wish we still lived somewhat close then we could swap kids once in a while. 🙂
Thank you the Greatest one. it certainly wasn’t hate mail. Just want to stir things up.
N-I-C-E dmm…schizophrenic much?
Sariah…I did something very similar once but personally I think mine was much more horrible. Thing One has all but forgiven AND forgotten thankfully. It’s ok. Promise.
K.
N-I-C-E dmm…schizophrenic much?
Sariah…I did something very similar once but personally I think mine was much more horrible. Thing One has all but forgiven AND forgotten thankfully. It’s ok. Promise.
K.
What ever. Sariah’s comment actually made sense but yours certainly doesn’t. Schizophrenia? Do you even know what it is? Do you feel like you belong more to the group because you can make fun of me.?
Sorry Sariah but it appears you have been found(?) by one nutjob blogger. It is a shame people need to make themselves feel better about themselves by trashing all over someone else’ blog.
K.
Sariah, yes it was awful to say, and yes, it will bother Aiden for awhile [hopefully not too long] but your children all know you love them [as does Ches] and you really do have a wonderful family. Perhaps you can sit down with Aiden when all is calm and remind him how he feels sometimes when he just needs some time alone, and that was all you meant. Or tell him about the time you kids “ran away” [for a couple hours] when we lived in IN and how you ran right back home again.
Erica, I didn’t realize the death thing still bothered you. I thought it was from my saying I was getting old that you thought I was going to die next year. I distinctly remember a conversation about that–and you seemed quite matter of fact about how I wouldn’t be there because I was going to die. I thought we put that one to rest forever ago! I plan to be around to watch all my grandchildren grow up–Richard said so! And he’s not even out of high school yet!
DMM, let’s just keep it clean, and no contention, please. And Sariah is a great Mom, and Ches a great Dad/Son-in-law…but I might be a bit biased!
Wow, I’m glad I waited a week before stumbling upon this post. Wow! Sariah when you stir up the beehive, you really stir it up! 😉
You know I love you! I’m so sorry that happened between you and Aiden, I’m sure it will settle out quickly enough but you’re right in saying you need to give him lots of hugs and reassurance. Hopefully he doesn’t have as long a memory as Will does. It amazes me the little things that I’ve said that he has remembered.
It will get better, I promise.
One of my favorite reasons to read mom’s blogs is to realize that I am not the only one that suffers from the “not-so-great mommy today” syndrome and my children are wonderful, even if I am having a hard time at the moment. Thanks for reminding us all of the importance of the words we say to our kids. 🙂 I am sure that you are a wonderful mom!
Anna (Lyon) Jones
Want to start your private office arms race right now?
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Check out the video they have on the page.
Cheers
Marko Fando
I’ve got an Amazon gift certificate burning holes in my pocket,
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