Today is one of those days where I just want to write and write, but I actually don’t have anything of importance to say. I have had this need inside me for several days now, but I’m so involved in getting this medical assistance thing figured out and trying not to go into labor that I actually can’t think of anything else.
The good news is that I got all my faxes sent. Hopefully the people who are supposed to fill out the forms and fax them back to the agency did that right away. I did add a note asking them to quickly do this for me.
You see? There it is, taking over my every thought process. I wonder what it is like to be a normal person who only has to worry about the upcoming birth and not about 5000 other things that are related to the upcoming birth, but that I shouldn’t have to worry about at this stage. Hmmmm.
More good news… my new Visiting Teachers have asked to throw me a baby shower. I don’t actually need anything (this is our third boy after all, and he’s due just three days before Aiden’s birthday. That should take care of everything), but I will never refuse free food and gifts. They asked me to make a list of what I would like or what I need. So the list is going to be nice and short: diapers, baby wipes, Diaper Genie refills, a Baby Bjorn, and a bassinette.
My mom called this morning with her flight info. I can’t wait for her to get here. I just want someone here with me, helping me. I’m in so much pain and everything is such an effort, and I feel like I’m the worst mother to Aiden and Dallin right now because of it. My temper is very short and my energy low.
I really can’t wait to be a normal human being again. Really. Just a few more months until I’ll start feeling like a person. Bear with me folks. This is a hard journey for me.