This is a story of a woman who has tried my patience and who I don’t want to gossip about but after church today, I’m more than a little frustrated. Enough is enough. And too many of you asked on Facebook what I was talking about, so I’m giving you the loooooooong version. You love me.

As my faithful readers know, last year I was the Primary Chorister at church. That meant I was in charge of the music for the children — teaching them songs and leading them and such. It was a really hard job for me and I did not enjoy it. I think I did an okay job at it, but after our yearly Primary Program, I was more than ready for someone else to take over. In January I was released from that calling, and someone else got the job. I was asked if I would be willing to sub every so often, and I said yes. I subbed for her quite a few times (at the very last minute, I might add) and talked to her a bit on the phone to answer any questions she had. The new music leader asked me for any materials I used, and I gave her a couple of things I had, but there just wasn’t much to give. I wasn’t given anything because there really isn’t a budget for it, and besides, it was a new year and the kids were learning all new songs. The games I had made and the visual aids I made were for the old songs they had learned and performed already. They didn’t need that stuff anymore.

A couple of months later, I was at the park after school with my kids and a lot of the neighborhood moms and their kids. It’s what we do here. heh. Anyway, the woman who became the new primary chorister was putting some visual aids together and talking to some of the other moms about the whole thing and complaining that she hadn’t been given anything. I don’t know if she didn’t realize I was sitting there (2 feet away… not hidden by anything… talking to friends over there…), but I didn’t feel it necessary to say anything about it to her. Someone else said, “You know, other music leaders in the past have just made things on their own. But if there’s no money, they draw pictures on the chalkboard or whatever. You do what you can.” I appreciated my friend for saying that and thought that would be the end of it.

And then the new music leader said, “Well, I guess I just care more than other people.”

I got up and went to play with my children. I didn’t need to hear anymore. I guess I just didn’t care enough about the Primary children. Whatever.

This woman has aggravated me on a bunch of other issues since then, and I feel like I have been more than nice to her and supportive of her (even when I absolutely didn’t want to be). Maybe I’m two faced and totally fake to be smiling and nice to her and then go and complain about her to my husband and my close friends, but that’s me. Two faced and fake. You probably all know that by now.

It has been a long time since any of the stuff about music has been mentioned and I thought everyone was over it.

The new music leader is no longer the music leader. Hasn’t been for about 2 months or so.

Today, in Relief Society (the Sunday meeting for our women’s association), we were talking about our talents and how we can use those to serve and uplift and magnify our callings and such. There was a great discussion and I was feeling really edified and uplifted. Really.

And then this women commented. In her comment she said, “When I became the chorister, I was so scared and felt so inadequate. I was given NOTHING to help me out. NO handouts or anything and so I just felt unprepared. So when they put in the new Primary Chorister, I made sure to give her ALL of my handouts and visuals and I told her I would answer any questions she had and just help her out so she would know what to do.”

This woman said more (that I don’t remember exactly what she said, but the gist of it was more of the same), but I sat there like a statue. I determined I wouldn’t change my facial expression or say anything because really, there was nothing to say. She obviously thought I was not supportive of her by not giving her materials (that didn’t exist!). She obviously didn’t remember the advice she had asked me about. She obviously didn’t remember me subbing for her many times and even finding a sub for her a couple of times when I couldn’t do it because of other commitments.

This woman also obviously doesn’t realize how hurtful her comments could be to the people she was talking about. She often says things without thinking about who is there and listening. She has no filter and just says whatever she wants. And that is why I was so upset after church today and put the status on Facebook that I did. Now you know.

Every time I think of going to the dentist, I can’t help but think of the scene from “Little Shop of Horrors” where Audrey’s sadistic boyfriend sings about how he became a dentist. I know a lot of nice people are dentists, but I do not like the dentist. I do not the sound of the drills and cleaning stuff. It hurts my teeth to even hear it from another room. I have tried not to let my fear and dislike of the dentist’s office show to my children, but it hasn’t mattered because we do not (and have never had) dental insurance, so we have not been to the dentist in… well, too long.

A week ago, after Sunday dinner, I noticed Parker’s cheek was a bit swollen. I thought perhaps he fell or tripped and hit his face on something. It’s been known to happen in our family. A lot. However, Parker was crying a bit and kept touching his tooth inside that cheek. So I talked to him a bit and looked at the tooth. He had a tooth ache. Poor thing! Parker has some pretty bad teeth. Just luck of the draw for some kids. No matter how well you actually take care of them, some kids (or adults, too) just have bad teeth. This particular tooth looked like it was completely rotted out. I had Ches call a guy we go to church with who is a dentist and who just bought his own practice. I wanted him to get the number of the practice so I could call and make an appointment in the morning. I realized that Parker’s cheek was swelling even more.

Parker was miserable all night and when he woke up in the morning it looked like he had a grapefruit stuck in his cheek. I had been giving him Tylenol for the pain, and I called the dentist’s office first thing in the morning. By the time he saw the dentist that afternoon (and I was able to look in Parker’s mouth again and see a huge sore on his gums next to the tooth he had been complaining about), Parker’s little face was ballooned out completely on the one side. Under and to the side of his eye, even. The dentist gave us a prescription for Amoxacillin and said to give him lots and lots of Ibuprofen for a couple of days to make the swelling go down. He scheduled Parker to come in the following Friday (two days ago) to have that tooth pulled, another tooth worked on (it’s not as bad as the first so they think they can save it, but it’s pretty bad still) and figure out when to do fillings on three front teeth.

The biggest obstacle is that Parker is only 3. The dentist explained that three year olds can’t really tell the difference between pain and pressure, and having a tooth pulled is a lot of pressure. Scott (the dentist) said he is quick, but he’d prefer to have Parker sedated just to get it all done and make it all easier. However, since we didn’t have insurance, I was worried about the cost. As much as I don’t want my son tortured, we can’t afford sedation. So they would give him the gas stuff (which I, personally, loved when I had my wisdom teeth pulled — all four at once, thank you very much, without being unconscious!) and I would get to help the assistant hold Parker down while the work was being done. Scott questioned if I would be able to handle it (it’s really really hard for moms to see their babies cry that much!), but I just didn’t feel like we had a choice.

We went to the pharmacy and went home. Within 12 hours the swelling was almost gone and Parker was having very little pain. Within 36 hours, the swelling was completely gone and Parker had no pain at all. I was pleased.

Friday morning, as I was taking Dallin to preschool, the dentist’s office called and said “We’re done with our patients, so if you want to bring Parker in now, that would be great!” So I made arrangements for Dallin, took a shower, and drove to the dentist’s.

Parker was given the blue bib thingy and he sat in the chair. The assistant prepared the tools, and showed Parker the sucker and let him touch it and kind of play with it for a minute. Scott came in to talk to us a couple of times, and Parker seemed to be getting comfortable in the chair. Unfortunately, the office had just gotten a new machine for the gas that morning, and it had a small leak. One of the dental assistants is pregnant, and Scott didn’t want her exposed to it. Don’t blame him for that one! Anyway, Scott took the machine outside to tighten it or whatever, and more gas came out. The leak got worse! So they were trying to get ahold of the company to come and replace it. (I heard them talking, and apparently the company said “That’s not our problem!” to which Scott replied, “It was all working fine until your guys touched it. It IS your problem!”)

So we rescheduled for Monday. A full week after we first saw the dentist, but that’s okay. Some people from church heard what was going on (I talk. And I posted stuff on Facebook!) and my friend Kim’s husband misunderstood the deal with the anesthesiology and thought Parker was getting nothing. He talked to a member of the bishopric, and they were very, very worried. The bishopric member called Scott and found out what was going on. He also mentioned another dentist (that neither Scott nor I know) who used to be in the same ward who would do the sedation for Parker and Scott could do the dental work. Scott was going to call that dentist and see what arrangements could be made for that because then we could get all the dental work done in one shot with very little stress for Parker (and a lot less stress for me).

And that’s where we sit right now. As far as I know right now, I’m taking Parker in tomorrow afternoon and going with the original plan of Happy Gas (that’s what I call it) and me holding him, but I may just get another phone call tomorrow and that could change again. Phew. And now you all know the whole story. Moral of the story? Take your kid to the dentist, even if you don’t have dental insurance. And trust your gut (if we had let that swelling get worse, the infection was headed toward a sinus where it then has access to the brain and that is just scary).

Thank you all for your prayers and good thoughts. Keep them up! I will keep you all updated.

There are days when I want to take Aiden by the shoulders, shake him, and yell, “You are Gifted!! Quit acting so DUMB!!”

I honestly can’t understand sometimes why such a smart little boy can “forget” to do something as simple as put his dirty socks in the laundry basket. The basket sitting right next to his door. And I just told him. He walked into his room to do just that, and then I catch him building with his Legos instead. The dirty socks are sitting on his bed, still. I don’t get it.

He forgets to turn in his homework. He remembers to take his homework binder out and have his teacher check the other work that he did, but he can’t remember to take the written work out of the front pocket and put it in the homework box. Every single day.

When it comes down to it, Aiden is a normal 7 year old with some pretty heavy brain power. I have to remember that. Just because he can read like a 5th grader doesn’t mean he is as mature as one. He does this crazy things because he is easily distracted or because he wants to see what will happen, such as when he squirts toothpaste in a line on the counter or yells “Hi Dad!” in the middle of a concert (even though i just spend 10 minutes discussing and quizzing the kids on proper concert behavior. He’s been going to concerts every couple of months for 7 years. This shouldn’t be a surprise. ~sigh~). He’s my Aiden, and I love him. Even when he frustrates the heck out of me and calls me an Evil Meanie.

I had my dream house all picked out. It is a colonial style with red brick and white pillars. It has a huge front yard and a huge back yard. It has fireplaces and a full basement. It has a family room and a formal dining room. It is just beautiful. It is also in Preston, Idaho.

It has been sitting on the market for a while (I happen to know the owners). It’s a totally affordable price. It’s just not where we live right now. That house screams “Sariah!” I know that house has been waiting for us to move back there because it’s supposed to be mine.

However, as in most things, this dream has come to an end. It has been sold and they close this week. I’m in mourning. Are we moving to Preston? I don’t know! Ches would need a job there, and that is a whole different discussion. As of right now, we are still in Arizona. In a rental. In a house that was supposed to be temporary (1 year) and is not anything at all what I want in a house.

The owner did tell me if it falls through she’ll let me know. ~sigh~ Is it wrong for me to hope that it falls through and to hope that the current band director doesn’t work out there so we can move into my dream house??? I’ll just keep hoping. I won’t actually pray for it.

(I’ll let Laural do that. hee hee)

Last year, as I was teaching toddlers and preschoolers, I came across this wonderful book by Laurie Berkner. (Laurie Berkner is a great children’s singer. She is often featured on “Jack’s Big Music Show” on Noggin, a Nickelodeon station for the preschool set. She does mostly original songs and kids just go nuts for her, as I saw in the preschool last year. Check out The Laurie Berkner Band if you are looking for something fun for a gift for a toddler) Normally I don’t like books with CD accompaniment, but this one is just great. The illustrations are beautiful, but even more beautiful is the song. It’s just a guitar accompaniment with Laurie Berkner on vocals and some simple harmonies. The lyrics are as follows:

This is the story of when I cry.
When I’m feeling sad, that’s when I cry
And it makes me feel better.
It makes me feel better.
You know it makes me feel even better when I cry.

This is the story of when I laugh.
When I’m feeling happy, that’s when I laugh
And it makes me feel better.
It make me feel better.
You know it makes me feel even better when I laugh.

This is the story of when I yell.
When I’m feeling angry, that’s when I yell
And it makes me feel better.
It makes me feel better.
You know it makes me feel even better when I yell.

This is the story of when I sigh.
When I’m feeling peaceful, that’s when I sigh
And it makes me feel better.
It makes me feel better.
You know it makes me even feel better when I sigh.

And when I cry.
And when I yell.
And when I laugh
You know it makes me feel better.

I love this book and this song. I called it my Magic Book at school because no matter how hyped up the kids were in class, as soon as the guitar starts playing each and every kid would settle down and look at the pictures and sing along to the song. I highly recommend this book and CD for all toddlers and preschoolers. I was listening to the song on my iPod today and I teared up a little because it’s just so beautiful.

I think too often we only want our kids to be happy children. We know they aren’t, and we know they cry and yell, but we tell them to stop. We do everything we can to make them stop. I am sure guilty of it. I hate it when my kids just cry and cry. Drives me bananas! However, don’t I often just feel better after a good cry? Sometimes I’m just sad and I need to cry. Sometimes I’m angry and I just need to yell, and then I feel better. If it’s that simple as an adult, why not with kids? I find myself telling my children “It’s okay to be mad right now, but don’t yell!” I am trying to change it to “It’s okay to be mad right now, but don’t yell at me. Go somewhere and just yell for a minute, and when you’re calm we’ll talk.” Kids need to express their emotions just as much as we do. As much as we all love the sound of a happy, laughing child, that’s just not going to happen all the time.

My favorite part of the song is the end. “When I’m feeling peaceful, that’s when I sigh.” We’re working on the peaceful feelings around here. The no TV, no fighting, no chaos feelings. I love it when we are all just sitting around, playing together or reading or whatever. And then I feel peaceful and I hope my kids do, too. And then I sigh because it makes me feel better.

**special note: I was not paid in any way for a review of this book and CD. No one asked me to review it. I just like it and wanted to share.**

My head hurts today. I’m having a headache where it feels like a million forks and knives stabbing into my brain. It feels like my brain is bursting and being squeezed into place in my skull. It doesn’t like being squeezed into place. It wants freedom! If I turn my head or bounce too much when I walk, another fork stabs at me. If someone makes the wrong sound or if the light turns on, add some more forks. All I want is to find a pitch black, cool, quiet room so I can sleep it off. If there is any noise, any light, or is even slightly too warm, my head just gets worse. I don’t have a pitch black, cool, quiet room. I don’t have anyone to even watch the kids while I sleep it off. So guess what I do in times like this? Suck it up and try not to move too much. And get off the computer for a few minutes.

The weather here has cooled off enough that we are able to go to the park after school again. It’s nice. (And let me just mention that it was suggested a few weeks ago that we start up “park days” after school again because the temperature would only be 97. Yeah.) The park is practically across the street from our house, and it’s where the bus stop is, so while Aiden does not ride the bus anymore, we meet at the park after school and play with kids who do ride the bus. Everyone gets all their wiggles out by running and screaming for a couple of hours, then it’s dinner time, homework time, then bedtime. I love it.

There are a lot of boys in the neighborhood, which is nice for my three boys. Not to say that there aren’t any girls. There are. I’m just not as aware because my boys pretty much only play with other boys (except for Ellie. All three of the boys love Ellie. Parker loves her the most, however, and calls her “My Ellie, My Friend Ellie” so much that whenever we see her Aiden or Dallin now say “Look Parker, there’s Your Friend Ellie!”). Boys, I am noticing, are extremely loud and overly active. They make weird sounds for everything and just can’t stop moving. I can’t get them to sit still for 2 seconds and take a drink of water. They bounce on the bench and look all around while taking a drink before they toss the water bottle to me and run off again. The boys chase each other with invisible guns and swords and yell at the top of their lungs. I’ve learned to tune most of it out as I would rather listen to something one of the moms is telling me rather than screaming from my son that the droids are attacking. The droids (or the clones) are always attacking.

One day last week I noticed that a girl was chasing Aiden. I didn’t think much of it, as she has two older brothers and she is in Aiden’s school and Primary classes. She can hold her own with boys, and she and Aiden see each other a lot so they seem friendly. Then I realized this girl was chasing Aiden, yelling, “Bacon!!!” over and over again. Turns out the girls in Aiden’s 2nd grade class like to chase the boys around during recess and call them bacon.

I had a great time teasing Aiden that the girls like him because everybody loves bacon and obviously she likes Aiden if she is going to call him bacon and chase him until she gets her bacon. Aiden didn’t find it as amusing as I did. I can’t wait ’til he’s in high school and I can really tease him about girls. Heh. (I’m such a good mom. So nice.)

It’s October! Do you know what that means? No, I’m not talking about pumpkins and harvest and candy corn.

Time to feel your boobs and encourage all your friends to feel their boobs. Yes, it it that important! And after you have done that, check out the official site for Breast Cancer Awareness Month or the site for the Susan G. Koman For The Cure.

This sign was up recently in the hallways of the high school Ches works at:

“Need help?? Totoring in the Library!!”

Someone had written on the sign, “Does that include spelling???”

I only wish I was kidding about this. It still makes me laugh, though.