Chocolate Phoenix

Saturday was our last marching band competition. May I just say one little thing for that? WO-HOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Really, as happy as I am that it is done for another year, I am sad, too. I love marching band so much. I love color guard. However, I don’t love getting up early every morning for rehearsal, having rehearsal almost every afternoon, and giving up almost every single Friday night and Saturday for a bunch of high schoolers! I’m going to miss them.

So let me tell you about Saturday: First off, I slept in. Ches had to be at the university extra early so that the band could rehearse and they could set everything up (he is a grad assistant for the bands at the university, and it was their competition on Saturday), and Ches thought that I didn’t have to be at HHS until long after 7 am. Nope. I had to be there at 7. A friend of mine was coming over at 6:45 to hang out with the kids and me all day. I didn’t get in the shower until 6:20. Not a good start at all. Ches left at that time, and so it was up to me to hurry myself up and get the kids ready and everything. So I got there at 7:30, and the girls were so pissed at me. For good reason. I get so mad at them for being that late! And the worst part was that I had two of their flags from our sectional the day before. They left the flags with me so that no one would forget to bring them so early the next day. Oops.

Well, rehearsal went okay, then we loaded the bus and headed over to the university. We had some warm-up time, but I didn’t want the girls to freak out and get tired too quickly, so I ran through the last song with them a few times (they just learned the last song Thursday morning, by the way), then I let them goof off. We did our guard dance (which is the “yo ho ho” dance that Captain Feathersword and his pirates do on the Wiggles. Don’t ask.), gave each other a pep talk, did our circle (more pep talks and a prayer), then we decided to head to the band and run through a couple of sections. It was all going okay. I didn’t expect too much, honestly. At the competition 2 weeks earlier the girls had rehearsed really well, but completely fell apart during performance. It was the worst thing I’ve ever seen, and I couldn’t talk to the girls for about half an hour. When I did start talking to them again, I refused to talk about the show. I was either going to kill them or kill myself if I did.

So anyway, back to this Saturday…

The girls put their flags in the right places on the sidelines , and got out on the field with the band in the perfect amount of time. The drum major, Mikey, saluted, climbed on top of the podium (his “magic carpet”), and started the band. The music (“Arabian Nights”) starts off very soft and slow, and the girls have a lyrical dance-like part with long, red ribbons. They kind of look like genies coming out of a bottle at first. It was going so well! The band was sounding great, the kids were in step.

The next section hits really big and loud from the band, and the girls switch suddenly to their first flags: yellow with orange, red, and gold lame’ that looks like flames. It was awesome! They had some timing problems, but were mostly together. And may I say, band ROCKED! The entire show! They were so on! I have never heard this little group play so well! My girls performed really well (not as well as I would have liked, but it was definitely their best performance, and I was really pleased with them). “Arabian Nights” goes to a great drum break and on to “One Jump Ahead”. Really energetic and exciting.

The second song starts with 2 of my girls running off field and lifting a giant banner to hide “Aladdin” (Mikey). The other two girls pick up chiffon, shaded flags that match their uniforms (blue with the one in blue, green with the one in green, and they other two have their matching flags — orange and pink — waiting for them). The band is playing “Prince Ali”. When it gets to the section where the lyrics say “Are you gonna love this guy!” the banner comes down and reveals that Aladdin has turned into Prince Ali. The crowd went wild. Again, my girls performed well for this piece, and the band hasn’t lost any of their energy. The end got a little sloppy for the guard, but they ended mostly together.

Our closer is called “Arabian Sunset” and is basically a reprise of “Arabian Nights”. It starts off with a trombone solo, then a trumpet solo. Very mysterious sounding, and my captain had a flag solo. The other girls then join her with the same flag — dark blues with dark purples; very pretty — and they have some good stuff going on. Again, timing problems at first, but then they are good. It’s obvious that this is fairly new work for them, but as the adjudicator said on the tape “good attempt”. They all ended together, which was the most important part. The band hit every thing, and kept up with the tempo changes and everything! It was just plain awesome!

As the band marched off the field and the staff and boosters were helping to quickly get the pit instruments off the field and onto the trailer, a band in the stand yelled “Thanks for the ride!” I have to say, it was some ride. Magic carpet ride indeed! All of the staff was extrememly happy.

Because it is such a small band, we competed in the smallest division, and were the second band of 19 to perform that day. Finally, it was time for awards. The directors (and their staff members in most cases, ours included) met at one area and were given the packets with score sheets and adjudicator tapes. The drum majors, guard captains, and percussion section heads all lined up in front of the stands. Since we had the packets, we were able to see our scores and know what we got, but couldn’t let the kids know. That killed me! I was so excited! The reason was…

HHS won FIRST PLACE band in the small division!!
The HHS color guard won the CAPTION AWARD for small division, meaning we won FIRST PLACE for that, as well!!

Our scores weren’t the best, but we were competitive, and we even beat the scores of 2 bands in the medium division and one band in the large division. It was a very good day.

For color guard, we have a tradition that we each have to lick our trophy (don’t ask me where this came from. They started it last year when we got first at a competition, and while I find it so disgsting, I do it anyway. Who can mess with tradition? Hee hee hee), so through the tears of four excited girls and one ecstatic coach, we each licked a different part of the trophy.

What a way to end the season.

Here’s my first movie review. We watched “Open Water” on DVD a couple of nights ago, and I thought I should give warning to all of you who haven’t seen it yet: Don’t.

It was boring. It didn’t have the ending we expected. It had some pretty bad acting. And it had a full frontal nude scene that was totally unnecessary. Let me explain why this bugs me so much.

In the movie, this couple is on vacation and the air conditioning in their hotel room is broken. Fine. So you’re hot and you want to sleep. No problems there. But why show us that on the movie? The wife is laying in bed, reading, with just the sheet on. However, the sheet only goes to her waist. The husband comes to bed, but with the clever camera angles, all you see is his bare back. No butt or anything. A minute later, the wife turns to turn off the light, the sheet comes down, and you can see everything below the waist as well as above now. I did NOT need to see that. Seriously. There wasn’t a need.

Here’s something else that really bugs me about the whole thing. The next scene the light is turned on and the husband is kneeling on the bed with a newspaper in his hand and he is trying to kill a mosquito or something. He is wearing blue underwear. Now, I don’t need to see this guy completely naked, either, but I don’t understand why we can see so much of the woman, but nothing of the man? Why is it acceptable to show full frontal nudity of any woman, but not of a man? Why the double standard? I’ve noticed in a lot of movies that you will often see a woman’s breasts (at least) and the most you’ll see of a man is his butt.

I really want to make it clear that I don’t want to see either person naked in any movie. I just want to understand where this double standard came from and why. In fact, on some show like Entertainment Tonight I saw an interview and an actor stated, “I don’t understand why a nude female generates an ‘R’ rating, but a nude male generates an ‘X’ rating.” I don’t remember what I was watching or who said it, and I know that the actor was mostly complaining about lack of nudity, not excess, but it is a valid question. Personally, I think both should be an “X” rating (or NC-17, or whatever). I really and truely don’t think it is necessary to show nudity!

Okay, so I just added two more links over there on the side, and I have to ask for some help because I’m sick of this: How in the world do I NOT have the spaces under almost every single link? No one else has those! I seriously don’t know what I’m doing wrong. I have retyped it several times, I have read Blogspot’s instructions thoroughly, but I can’t get it right.

Oh, and how do I add links in a post? Like the rest of you do? I mean, say I mention something about Alyson, how do I make it so that you can click on her name and get to her blog? Something like that. I can do pictures, so is it the same basic concept?

I’m so not a computer person!

I sometimes have to wonder about dreams. Are they subliminal messages from your brain, deep memories breaking out, prophecies for your life, or just something crazy that happens every now and then?

I mentioned before that the reason I got interested in my husband is because of a dream. Normally, I don’t believe in most dreams telling the future (at least not for me), but this one was different. I had already met him, but he so wasn’t my type (other than the fact that he is a trumpet player and has a deep, bass voice), so I didn’t think much about him. I was busy in my own life. One night, I had a dream. My dreams are often more like movies, so I’m watching myself in this “movie” rather than being myself. Anyrate, all I really remember is suddenly I’m sitting on this cream colored couch with Ches, we are holding hands, and he says something. We look at each other, and this look passes between us that just spills out total intimacy. You have seen it in couples, both old and new, that are totally in love, right? That was it with that look between Ches and me. The whole thing was so vivid and felt so real. I woke up right after that thinking, “Wow! That was powerful! Who is that man? I have to get to know him.” Thus, the stalking began (hee hee hee). In some ways, I guess I fell in love with him in my dreams (how cheesey is THAT?)

Last night, I had a dream and while I don’t really remember most of the details, I do remember that one of my best friends from high school was in it. Her name is Shannon, and I miss that girl. We became good friends junior year, and got really close senior year. We kept in close contact freshman year of college (I went to Idaho, she stayed in Arkansas), but it drifted after that. We had so much fun together. She stayed friends with Jerkfaced Liar (my h.s. boyfriend), and I’ve always been a bit jealous of that. Last year at some point Jerkfaced Liar IM’d me (our 10 year reunion was coming up), and we ended up talking about Shannon. I really am jealous that he maintained a relationship with her. I want my old friend back in my life. My dream last night just made me miss her so much. I have her email address, and I’m considering emailing her, but I have contacted a few old friends in recent years (most of whom have remained close friends with Jerkfaced Liar), so after a couple of emails I never heard from them again. I want lasting friendships. I have so few of those.

Because my family moved so much while I was growing up, I never kept in really close contact with many people for very long. I still email my best friend from 5th grade (she so rocks. She even calls me every now and then), and I’m mostly in contact with TexAngel through our blogs (we were really close in h.s., too). I have a couple of friends from my college and university years, but there are others that I wish I still knew.

I guess I’m one of those people who need her friends around. I was talking to my mom last night about how I know it’s so silly, but I am constantly trying to “dress the part”. I care about what everyone thinks of me. I need losts of people around me to validate me. I have a hard time feeling good about myself, and I need others to do the work for me. I care about being popular. I’m almost 29 years old, and I still want to hang out with the “cool kids”! However, if I have a good group of friends that I’m in close contact with (read: I need lots of emails and phone calls and visits), I don’t really care about the cool kids. I care about my friends.

My dream makes me want to rekindle some friendships (especially Shannon right now), but do I dare? I don’t want to just get left all alone again.

I was driving home from rehearsal the other day when I heard the DJ on the radio give information on a new home development. What he said was this:

You should really head down to [Suchandsuch] Drive and check out these [Majorcompanyname] Homes. They are built well and quite affordable in this market. Most are about 4 bedrooms, 2 baths, and that should be a really good size for most people, unless you’re one of those huge Mormon families and you just won’t fit in that. So, here’s the directions: [DJ gives directions]. Seriously, if you are in the market, check out these homes. They’re great. Oh, and I have nothing against Mormons. I love Mormons! In fact, I lived in Salt Lake City for about five years, so I really do like Mormons. They just tend to have really big families and need bigger houses than most people. That’s all I was saying.

Wow. Someone is afraid of angry emails/phonecalls to the radio station! I laughed for 10 minutes.

Star Wars
Obi Wan Kenobi
Darth Vader
light saber
hand
licking hand
yeah
and talking Aiden
Mom
Little Einsteins
Woody
Toy Story
Toy Story
2
1234
lots of 4s. 44444444444
No wonder
yes wonder
I don’t paint and see
sure!
ha!!!!!!
oooooooo
pumpkin
a BIG pumpkin
little pumpkins
medium pumpkins
everything you want
we’re all done
let’s play Candyland
bye, see ya tomorrow

There is only a week and a half left of marching band. I mean to the last competition (because dang it all, the one football team has to go and be a good team and make it to playoffs). I’m sooooo happy to be so close to done. I will get some sanity back. I will get some sleep. I will get to play with my sons. I will get to save money on gas. I will get my life back. No more of the drama that comes with being around a group of high school girls! No more having to find a sitter for every single stinkin’ Saturday. No more having to take a breast pump with me and hiding under a blanket so I don’t leak milk all over a school bus.

Can we all tell that I’m a little happy?

At our last competition, my HHS girls had such a bad performance, I had to stop watching. I’d look up again, just to groan and look away. It was horrible. I couldn’t talk to the girls for about half an hour afterwards, and they were smart enough to know not to approach me. Hopefully we will not have those problems again. It sucked.

My RHS girls actually did pretty well. I met up with them at the competition (HHS performed earlier in the day, so I rode the bus with them), and was surprised at how happy the girls were to see me. It made me feel special. I guess they have finally accepted me. Anyrate, they had one of their better performances, but there were still a lot of little, stupide mistakes. They are also performing at the same competition as HHS next week, so I will be able to help out both guards.

Aiden wants me to type his name. He’s very excited right now. Once marching band is done, we will go back to our “homeschool preschool” that I have started. We are learning to write letters, what letters sound like, we read books together, and do crafts. He really wants to make some bats for Halloween. We have already made Jack-O-Lanterns and ghosts to hang on the wall. We’re actually looking a bit festive this year.

Aiden is going to be Woody (from Toy Story) for Halloween. Dallin is going to be a frog. Aiden couldn’t be happier. He tells everyone in sight what he gets to be. Thank you so much, Camille! We can’t wait for the costumes to get here.

Taking an informal poll… what should I be for Halloween? I really like to dress up, but I’m just plain out of ideas. I hate to dress up as the same thing more than one year in a row. The last few years I have been the following: Hermione Granger, Homestar Runner, a hockey player (complete with black eye that everyone at church thought was real, so Ches started telling people “yeah, I hit her.”), a princess, a chef, a scarecrow, and a U of I colorguard member (okay, so the church party was the same night as a game and Ches and I just wore our band uniforms). Oh, and I’m not really into the whole “Mean Girls” thing of using Halloween as an excuse to dress up like a slut. So unoriginal!

I thought, why the heck not? Everyone else is doing it. It’s been fun to read. I’m just a big copycat anyway. Here goes:

1. I was born on Christmas Eve.
2. I’m the oldest child. That means everything that the “studies” say it does.
3. I have a trophy for playing soccer when I was younger. We got 2nd place (we only lost one game all season, including playoffs).
4. I once took tennis lessons.
5. I was on the volleyball team in middle school.
6. I don’t consider myself athletic at all. I quit sports by the time I was in high school.
7. When I went to college, I had a Southern accent. It went away.
8. I met my husband in college at a band party where I was rude to him. He doesn’t remember meeting me, thankfully.
9. I had a dream about him a week later and that was how I got interested in him.
10. I got married at 21.
11. I thought I was way too young to get married, but I wanted to marry Ches.
12. Ches wasn’t going to wait for me, so I knew if I wanted to marry him, it would have to be then.
13. My plans at the time was to go on a mission for the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints.
14. I know that I made the right decision, but sometimes I’m still sad.
15. I feel left out when I with a group of women who are returned missionaries and I don’t have any experiences to share.
16. Ches promised me that when we are older we will go on a mission together.
17. I have been in marching band in some form or another for about 13 years now.
18. I have been playing my flute for almost 20 years.
19. I always wanted to play the trumpet, until I took Brass Techniques in college and found out I’m a lot better at the trombone.
20. I also love to play percussion. Not drumset, though.
21. I have also always wanted to play guitar.
22. I took a guitar class at Ricks, but hated it.
23. I can only play about one song on the guitar.
24. I would like to learn “Blackbird” by Paul McCartney.
25. We have 9 musical instruments in our house: 2 flutes, 2 trumpets, a piccolo, violin, guitar, cornet, and a clarinet.
26. We also have a set of drumsticks and mallets, but that is debatable on whether or not it’s musical.
27. I want the new Bissell “Spot Bot” that I’ve seen on TV. Now I know I’m a “desperate housewife”.
28. Ches and I got married in the Mr. Timpanogos Temple in American Fork, Utah.
29. It was the most perfect weather that day.
30. We didn’t have very many people show up to the wedding.
31. The best was a groups of friends from Ricks that came together (Dana, Camille, you were there!).
32. There were these beautiful tulips all over and I thought it made the day even more perfect.
33. Ches forgot to bring the wedding ring, so he made me give him back the engagement ring to give to me in the Temple.
34. He gave me my wedding band outside just before pictures.
35. For our 7th anniversary, I gave birth to our second son, Dallin.
36. I had a really bad cold, as did Ches and Aiden.
37. My cold miraculously went away right after the birth.
38. I’ve never been to band camp (save the American Pie jokes).
39. I’m scared of the dark.
40. I’m even more scared of what’s in the dark.
41. When I was little, my father told me there were spiders and snakes on my bedroom floor to keep me in bed at night.
42. To this day I have to jump from the lightswitch to my bed once I have turned out the light so the spiders and snakes won’t get me.
43. I just found out a few years ago that he told me this.
44. I hate the song “Mother I love you” from Primary.
45. When I was little, my brother, sister, and I were supposed to be sleeping, but weren’t so Mom came down to spank us, but by the time she spanked Lura and me, Vinnie started singing “mother I love you” and she left the room laughing without giving him a spanking.
46. My brother and sister are my absolute best friends in the whole world.
47. Vinnie used to cover for me in high school when I was late for curfew.
48. One time he didn’t realize it was me and I was trying to climb through the window and get his attention at the same time.
49. He thought someone was trying to break in, so he woke up my parents, who promptly called the police.
50. Once my parents saw it was me, my mom hung up on the police and I knew there was a very slim chance that I would live to see the sun rise the next day.
51. My favorite thing to eat in the entire world is dark chocolate. Can’t get enough of it.
52. I have a huge chocolate craving right now.
53. Someday I would like to live in London, England.
54. Or Windsor.
55. My aunt took me to London when I was 20 years old.
56. We went to “see castles and plays”.
57. While in Windsor, we walked over the bridge to Eaton and made fools out of ourselves.
58. I was wondering why all these school boys from Eaton College were wearing tuxes with tails, so we stopped a kid and said, “Excuse me, but we’re stupid American tourists. Why are you wearing a tux?” to which he replied “They are my school uniform.”
59. I was quite surprised and said “You wear that everyday?? I wear jeans and a t-shirt”.
60. I easily say stupid things to people.
61. Once I was in a restaurant and my husband recognized the guy at the next table as a former contestant on “Blind Date”, so we talked to him.
62. Before anyone could say anything, I blurted out with, “I totally saw you on TV!!”
63. My sister wouldn’t let me talk to some of her wedding guests because they were Tony award winners and didn’t want me to look stupid.
64. I have a book signed by John Lithgow, which is now one of my favorite possessions.
65. I often wish I had taken dance more when I was younger and had majored in that in college.
66. For our 10th anniversary I want a big party with a big band so we can dance.
67. We didn’t have a dance at our wedding. Ches didn’t want it.
68. Also for our 10th anniversary, I want to go on a cruise.
69. I’ve never been on a cruise, but both my brother and sister got to gon on one for their honeymoons.
70. We went to San Francisco on our honeymoon.
71. We walked all the way from Pier 1 to Pier 49 one day. (Don’t do that).
72. I hope to have a daughter some day.
73. I hope it won’t be too soon, though.
74. I hate pregnancy.
75. Both of my boys were born by c-section, and I don’t really enjoy that, either.
76. I get panic attacks.
78. It started sometime in college, when I was really turning into a perfectionist.
79. I wish I looked like Nicole Kidman, just not as tall.
80. I like the height that I am, except when my family makes fun of me for being the short one.
81. I’m only 5′4″, so I’m not actually short.
82. I love marching band, but I can’t wait for November to get here.
83. When people yell at me, it makes me cry very easily.
84. When I get upset, I also cry very easily.
85. I’m only on 85 and I have to leave for rehearsal in 10 minutes.
86. I don’t think that pregnant women should ever have to clean a bathroom.
87. Cleaning the bathroom is my least favorite chore.
88. My biggest goal for the future is to buy a house.
89. My mom and dad just bought their first house, and Mom is 53.
90. I know that wasn’t about me, but it was indirectly.
91. I’m going to be 29 in 2 months.
92. My mom recently said that she has been a mom for 30 years, and I got offended. I’m not even 29 yet, Mom!!!
93. I often get mistaken for a high schooler.
94. I want to dye my hair some outrageous color (like plumb purple), but feel that since I’m a mother and stuff that I should be more mature, so I can’t.
95. I love celebrating Canadian Thanksgiving as well as American Thanksgiving because I love turkey sandwiches.
96. My favorite LDS Temple on the inside is Cardston, Alberta.
97. My favorite LDS Temple on the outside is San Diego, California.
98. I used to wish my name were Holly (even though that would be too cheesey).
99. Sariah means Princess of God in Hebrew.
100. I have grown to love my name a lot.

Happy Thanksgiving!

Eat lots of turkey and pumpkin pie for me.

[Note: The title needs to be read as if you were Napolean Dynomite. It only works that way.]

So apparantly I’m the only person in the entire world who doesn’t know that you can’t just stop taking antidepressants cold turkey. You’re supposed to taper off. I find this out after not taking mine for 6 days now.

Boy, am I the world’s biggest idiot or what?

Now I’m majorly crashing. I’m crying at anything and everything. I want to rip the heads off of some people. And I feel as if I’m going to pass out about every 10 minutes or so. Oh yeah, and if I get too upset, I might just throw up, too.

In my defense: I honestly didn’t know! No one told me! I don’t have any insurance at the moment (I don’t understand Medicaid. I send everything in I’m supposed to, they take forever to look at it, then send me more forms to fill out and a note saying to prove certain income that I already sent them!!), and we don’t have any extra money, so I can’t get my prescription refilled. I was just waiting until I get this Medicaid thing straigtened out, then I would get my refill. Or so I thought.

When I walked in from marching band rehearsal this morning, Ches said “How are you this morning?” and I just burst into tears. Again. I couldn’t even talk. He then handed me a credit card and said, “Go get your refill. I thought all this time you needed to go to a doctor. I didn’t understand that you just needed a refill.”

My wonderful husband. He just wants me happy. He spent the morning cleaning the kitchen, calling on getting our camera repaired, balancing the checkbook, folding laundry, and picking up our room and the living room. He should have been doing homework or practicing. Instead, he is trying to help and support me. What a good man. I’m so glad I married him.

As soon as Dallin wakes up, I’m off to Wal-Mart. Hopefully it won’t take a week or two to get back to Happy Sariah Land. Right now, this just sucks.